roses of heaven by Yun-Fei Wang (16, Taiwan)

that winter night, your voice sent the sky into flames 
when you asked about the smears of dirt on my arm 

city lights, acid rain, wishing you didn’t believe a word 
when i told you it was to feel alive now that it’s all gone 

---

i couldn't show you the garden, roses as red as my 
bloodied wishes, black as the nightmares that followed 

instead i held the spare key under star-burnt tongue 
until every lie i’ve ever said to you bled through my lips 

the truth is my hands were dirty from planting roses 
digging deep into soil with shovels that looked like knives 

cracked asphalt and neon signs, planted another seed 
quiet nights, when missing you was unendurably dark 

soil sank a little with every step i walked closer to light 
rose thorns scratching my ankles, the hem of your skirt 

carved stars on my skin, made sure i ignited only for you 
staining every petal in a flaming hell sweeter than heaven 

cold moonlight, soaking flimsy petals in clear, hot water 
wanting a taste of the aftermath burning down my throat 

misted tip of my tongue soft as rain weaved in your hair 
it’s nights like this i could believe i’ll make it out alive 

the next moment i think of nectar dissolving on your lips 
chains of rose thorns you used to wrap around my neck 

nostalgia slipped through my fingers in a hazy dream 
porcelain shards scatter the ground, white like fangs 

cut right through my bandaged hands, i tried to grasp 
liquid memories from the pieces of a cup half empty 

until the hot water started to bleed and i crashed 
into ruins of blood and tea, the last tastes of you

quiet nights, under stars, rose petals wet on my skin 
they crawl and they bloom and they take away the 

numbness left of me as i bloom from scarlet wounds 
until the air becomes reminiscent of your shadow 

the light i once swallowed burns out in my veins 
unhinge my body with rose thorns that grew from 

every wound like a constellation i couldn't touch 
and vines tense beneath my skin like crawling veins 

in a world where stars and roses look so much like you 
break me until i fold into the crook of your smile 

and peel away last layers of lies, the summer of 2017 
you had only found me because i wanted to be found
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