I don't seem to understand because... by Julia Ongking (Philippines)

there are some days where none of it seems real. when nothing seems real, when you feel like life isn’t real and you’re just on some weird ship going to some weird destination that you know you’ll never truly know. a destination where all souls congregate, where your once fervently celebrated individuality dissolves into absolute nothingness and you are back with nothing but everything and you don’t know who you are anymore because really you aren’t anyone anymore but you are everyone and absolutely everything now. ​

---

you fought for nothing, you realize. you fought for nothing, because this whole time you were just completely fooling yourself in thinking that you were somebody else when in reality you are just the same as everybody else and there will never be a single distinction between you and your best friend or you and your worst enemy. because at the end, at the very very end, you will try and try and try to reach for your arm, your neck, your heart, and you will find nothing and you will find everything. and it’s then that you will finally realize that really, it was all just you. it was all just you. and now everything seems to be tumbling away, too fast, too fast, too fast, until it’s all gone.