graduation by Syna Majumder (16, India)

[Content warning: self-harm, suicidal thoughts]

​a kid in his very last years 
of school will always be some 
new and terrifying phenomenon; 
churning between existence and 
adulthood because we know only 
one of them allows you to breathe. ​

---

there will be parties and there will 
be drinking for celebration or 
some perverted mourning. 
you can always map out his 
lungs collapsing in the sound of 
his laughter and how his steps 
falter whenever he leaves the house. 
not every ending is a happy one. 
not every change is one to celebrate 
in changing colours and happy parents. 

a kid in his very last days 
of school will be incomplete, 
waiting for a life to begin, one 
pre decided by time, fate and 
grades. he wants the tall fall from 
clouds to concrete, the warm 
blood gushing down his face. 
I am an actor now, he declares. 
the end of a story changes everyone, 
and a schoolboy is at once broken 
and volatile. he is searching for a way 
to turn into marble just so an artist falls 
in love with him. he is searching for enough 
money to scream and wilt and survive. 
he is searching for happiness, and faith. 
he is all grown-up now, God save him. 

​