I always wonder what it is like to be someone else. I was always a quiet kid, someone who didn’t talk much and preferred a book over people. Until now.
I guess being mute was boring after a while. Sure, I wasn’t completely mute, I still talked, but it seemed like the world hated me. Remember that feeling when everyone in your class got ice cream and you didn’t? It kind of feels like that. I was left out.
Worse of all, my best friend last year had ditched me. And the one before that was in a car accident. I know she made it out alive, but she had to face multiple surgeries. That was depressing.
I like to say that the world revolves around me, but to be honest, it doesn’t. It never will. And it will stay like that.
That’s what my school counselor said last year. I can’t control people, but I want to. Then everything will go my way. For me, that is just not reality.
Reality. I hate reality. It just tears me apart. Sometimes, I wish I can just fall into a hole and drown.
Now, I am that someone else that I kind of want to be. A writer, funny, talkative, smart. But I still have the pieces of me that were there before. The old me.
The quiet one. The one that doesn’t talk much. The one with no friends. I still feel that way and I know it will never leave me.
Sometimes, that is just reality.